Thursday, December 25, 2008

Catching Up With 101 in 1001

Several months ago, I made my big list of 101 things to accomplish in 1001 days.  The original entry is here

I’m going to address each of the list items in the next few days, starting with the first 11.

1. Sew more new garments than I buy.
This has turned out to be somewhat unreasonable.  Quality fabric is expensive and I only buy clothing if it a really good deal, so my sewing is going to remain for pleasure or for projects.

2. Turn the second spare bedroom into an office/craft room.
Man, we need to get on this.  I still have two free days this long weekend that I should commit to this goal.

3. Wear size 8 jeans comfortably.
I’m not giving up on this, but it hasn’t happened yet.

4. Become proficient enough at the banjo to play along at guitar nights.
Tom recently bought a bass.  I’m hoping that we will motivate one another to practice.

5. Auction all of my antiques and vintage clothing.
All of them that I wanted to get rid of are gone. 

6. Paint the stairwell.
I still haven’t figured out how to paint the really high bits.

7. Bake a delicious and attractive layer cake.
I have delicious under control, but beautiful still eludes me.

8. Visit two new states.
I would love to visit our friend Dave in North Carolina, but I don’t have the strong urge to go anywhere else.  We have a ski trip in Colorado coming up soon, my cousin’s wedding in Wisconsin in June and a trip to Texas to see me my mom, which is yet to be scheduled.

9. Learn to snowboard.
I’ll see.  Lift tickets are so much more expensive this year that I’m not sure I want to waste a day on the slopes falling on my ass, especially since I now have my own skis.

10. Crochet a tuque for Tom.
When we have Christmas with Tom’s family on Sunday I plan to have his mom, a crocheting wizard, help me with my technique.  My stitches are absurdly tight and I’m not sure that I’m reading the instructions properly.

11. Finish my master’s degree.
Man, I’m so torn about this.  I love my new job and it has nothing to do with my education, but I have no idea what the future holds.  I’ll think about this some more in the new year.  It makes my head hurt to think about it too long.

Monday, December 22, 2008

I Am So Smart

I am watching 120 Minutes on VH1 Classic, which reminds me of how absent minded I can be.  I once had the following conversation…

me:  I loved 120 Minutes.
someone else, who is younger than I am:  What was that?
me:  It was a show on MTV that played alternative music for, like, an hour and a half on the weekends when I was babysitting.
someone else, who knows how time works:  I’m pretty sure that it was on for two hours...or 120 minutes.

11 of 365

1. my Tokay gecko, Colonel Floyd Stickypants, that has been with us for 10 years

2. Christmas cards from my “little” cousins now that they are all grown up
3. watching friends react with strength to their very difficult circumstances
4. looking forward to Christmas morning because of the gifts that I’m giving, not the gifts that I have received or might receive
5. Tom’s scalloped potatoes, which we took to a pot-luck this evening

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Catching Up

7 of 365

1. circus peanuts, just a few at a time
2. the days when my jeans fit right out of the dryer
3. having the room for a cabinet to display my great-grandmother’s china
4. leaving the house in the morning without forgetting anything important
5. when the forecast for ice is wrong, which it hasn’t been lately

8 of 365

1. when the dogs are feeling playful
2. capturing a photo the way I imagine it
3. when I can get the fire started the first time
4. when something I read actually makes me laugh out loud
5. dill havarti cheese

9 of 365

1. animals dressed like people
2. even more, animals dressed like other animals
3. finishing a big project, today it was my Christmas shopping
4. beating Tom at Scrabble, which happens too infrequently
5. my new combination of crazy pills

10 of 365

1. a well stocked wood pile for the fireplace
2. brand new very sharp scissors
3. KFC gravy
4. lists, I make many, which is why I like this project
5. dill pickles, the more garlic the better

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

A Lot of Cursing In Here

I have always had a potty-mouth.  I was raised by a father who can curse very creatively and who never hesitated to call a lawn mower a cunt, so I’m not really bothered by the swears, you see.

Right now, everything in my head and, sometimes, coming out of my mouth, revolves around the words mother and fuck.  I blame some of this on Samuel L. Jackson and those pesky airplane snakes.  I blame the t-shirt that exclaims that it’s Motherfucking Booze Time and I blame Spike Lee for the memorable, “D motherfucker D” battery scene.  This morning, I couldn’t help but think that it was Motherfucking Shower Time and that I needed to put my motherfucking purse in my motherfucking truck.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

5 and 6 of 365

5 of 365

1. sitting on the couch with Tom and both dogs after his return from Florida last night
2. finding three dollars in my coat pocket this morning, surprise dollars are the best
3. soup, all of it, whether it is homemade, from a can or some combination thereof
4. the pattern that I bought on etsy to make each of my grandmothers a cute little felt nativity scene
5. ranitidine, the only acid blocker that keeps my heartburn away

6 of 365

1. my leather jacket, it is warmer than anything else that I own
2. the courteous bad weather drivers, of which I wish there were more
3. filing my nails with a brand new emery board
4. the stuffed meerkat that Tom brought me from Florida, which will sit on my desk and watch for predators
5. the cloth seats in my truck because the non-cloth seats in the car make my ass cold

Monday, December 15, 2008

Date Porcupine Cookies

My Great-aunt Janet made hundreds, perhaps thousands of Christmas cookies every year to give away.  They were all delicious, but these were my very favorites. 

3/4 cup granulated sugar
1 cup chopped dates
2 eggs, well beaten
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup chopped walnuts
1 cup corn flakes cereal
1 cup crispy rice cereal
1 1/2 cup flaked coconut

In a skillet, combine sugar, dates, and eggs. Cook over medium heat, stirring, until mixture pulls away from sides of skillet, about 5 minutes. Remove from heat; stir in vanilla and walnuts. Carefully stir in cereals; cool slightly. When mixture can be handled, shape into balls with hands moistened with cold water. Roll each ball in coconut; store in covered container in the refrigerator.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

4 of 365

1.  the Sunday crossword puzzle
2.  a quilt fresh from the dryer
3.  the wireless internet that allows me to piddle around on the internet from anywhere in the house
4.  Super Troopers
5.  pulling the clothes out of the dryer before they wrinkle so that I don’t have to iron

Saturday, December 13, 2008

3 of 365

1.  my fondue (1 c. of your favorite beer (the darker the better, in my opinion), 4 c. shredded cheese (I like cheddar), a hefty squirt of spicy mustard)
2.  Parliament-Funkadelic
3.  Rayman Raving Rabbids for wii, it made me laugh until it hurt
4.  Village Books, the local store where I can turn in books for credit toward new ones
5.  the dance scenes in Footloose, especially when Chris Penn is learning

Friday, December 12, 2008

2 of 365

1.  Peppermint Chap Stick
2.  Boboli 8” Mini Pizza Crust
3.  cheese graters, I have accidentally started to collect them
4.  So I Married an Axe Murderer
5.  Cyndi Lauper’s “Girls Just Want to Have Fun”

Thursday, December 11, 2008

I am a Joiner

Unfortunately, I am rarely a finisher, but I’m going to give Grace In Small Things a shot.  I have hopped onto another 365 day bandwagon to help combat the gloom and the crabby that is currently making me a stick in the mud.  Lifted from Schmutzie’s site, I will attempt to share the things that please me, five at a time, every day.

1 of 365

1. warm dog bellies
2. Diet Dr. Pepper
3. messages from long distance friends
4. Curel Ultra Healing lotion
5. Bailey’s mint chocolate Irish cream

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

We Need a New Greeting, Apparently

When Tom travels, I always greet him, upon his arrival in a new place with, “Welcome to ... (Miami, Cleveland, Chicago etc.)”.  Because of Tom’s ridiculously bad luck with reaching his travel goals, this doesn’t always work for me.  “Welcome to Canada” never worked out.  Cleveland and St. Paul?  Yes.  Canada?  Never.  Who tries to fly to fucking Canada in the winter anyway?

Tonight, there was a new wrinkle.  Tom, his brother and his father are going to Florida to see Tom’s uncle.  Tom and his brother arrived at our house at noon-ish to meet his father and drive to St. Louis, where their plane was leaving from (or from whence their plane would leave for the grammatically correct amongst us).  So, at 8:30pm local time, I called Tom and said, “Welcome to Florida!” He said, “I am not in Florida”.  I was immediately alarmed.  What happened to delay them?  “Where are you?”, I foolishly asked.  “St. Louis”, he replied.

Turns out, this is not a problem.  Their flight does not leave St. Louis until 8:00 tomorrow morning.  I totally get why they drove out there today.  It sucks to leave here at four in the morning to meet the two-hour-before-flight-time deadline.  What I want to know is why they met up here twenty hours before flight time.  He couldn’t explain it to me because a) his fellow travelers were right there and thought that the plan was OK and 2)* well, there is no 2, there is no good explanation.

I love Tom and I think his family rocks, but they have their own brand of crazy with which I have to deal (again with the good grammar).

*My nod to Paul Reiser, the 2) after a) thing…

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Trying to Conjure the Holiday Spirit

I’m not actually trying to raise the dead or bring out any ghosties.  I just want to feel that little spark of excitement at the prospect of another Christmas.  I’m not what some might consider religious these days, so I don’t get that warm fuzzy Jesus feeling this time of year, but I do usually enjoy the memories of Christmas past when I decorate with heirlooms or get a tiny adrenaline rush when I’ve found just the right thing for a friend or family member.  We have put up the tree, recorded hours of our holiday favorites on the DVR and have the satellite radio set on Christmas tunes, but it just isn’t working.  Bah Humbug, everybody!

Maybe I just have to wait for the family stuff to get in the mood this year.  I am really looking forward to Tom’s great-nieces (he is old) being old enough to have fun with presents.  Last year, M was just a tiny baby and A was only old enough to keep my lap warm and share some truly awesome peppermint drool with me. 

Baking also works wonders.  Maybe this weekend I’ll bust out the butter and lard and go to town.  Seriously, I don’t care how carefully you eat at any other time of the year.  Cookies are only as delicious as their percentage of animal fat.  Don’t be afraid of the lard!  If a recipe calls for 1 cup of butter, cut that in half and make up the rest with that waxy white slab of heaven*.  Yes, it is gross, but it is also the key to confectionery perfection.

* I really am a heathen, I misspelled heaven twice before getting it right.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

I Love This Place

We have been in Wisconsin since Wednesday night and I have had the best time.  I never laugh as hard as I do when I am with the Wisconsin girls.  We are currently in the car on our way to pick up skis from my aunt in Madison and it finally occurred to me that I can post from my phone.  Perhaps I will write more often now that I can post from anywhere.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

It Isn’t Just the Holidays

In addition to all of the holiday nonsense, Tom and I have two other big events coming up.  In January, we are having a big 10th anniversary party, which we refer to as our Living in Sin party.  Here’s to ten years of not marrying one another!  Let’s shoot for at least ten more!  It will be on scale with your average* wedding reception, so there is quite a bit of work to be done.

We are also going to Colorado the first week in February, so I’m sure there will be trips to the sporting goods stores in our future.  We pretty much have everything we will need, but extra base layers and a fancy new hat never hurt anyone.

Oh, and I have had some phone trouble.  I inherited Tom’s Treo when he upgraded at work.  I had been using it for almost two weeks when it met with a tragic accident.  Last night I stopped to drop off cash for the upcoming ski trip to my friend Heather.  She works for a large hotel in town and, on my way out, I decided to use their very nice restroom with very powerful toilets (foreshadowing) before I headed back out into the cold.  I was wearing my jacket and had tucked the phone in one of the pockets.  As I was doing a final clothing adjustment before leaving the stall, the auto-flush feature whooshed behind me.  I turned just in time to see my phone getting sucked away.  Apparently, though I neither felt nor heard this happen, my phone leapt from my coat pocket and tripped the flush sensor.  It was gone before I could do a thing about it.  Luckily, because I am well aware of my limitations, I carry the full insurance, so the phone will be replaced with very little expense.

* When I say average, I mean average for the real people that I know.  I do not mean the average that wedding magazines would lead you to believe.  No single item, including the food or the beverages, will require a number of dollars that requires a comma.

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